Tag Archive: Retreat


Linking up with Lisa Jo Baker

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So I spent last week on a silent retreat, checking my phone and all the feeds on it only twice a day. Then the chaos, my thoughts and feelings got too much…a choice between running away, staying in bed (which I then couldn’t cos the builder needed to work in my room) or making a concession to myself that I could use my phone, check Facebook and twitter as much as I wanted, text my closest friends to ask them to pray or to rant about how awful I felt.

Problem was…by the end of the day my phone broke, not just broke, it died. I have since had an enforced retreat from the connectedness a mobile phone gives you. Since last week, my phone refuses to turn on at all. And I don’t mind the peace and quiet, there’s something positive about only being able to be contacted via Facebook. It’s also when I realise just how much we rely on our smartphones – a constant link to Facebook, twitter, blogs, emails. Connecting to others, letting them know how we are, that the train’s delayed. A monthly calendar, an agenda, photos, a way to download podcasts. Without a phone or an internet connection its easy to feel invisible.

First my phone broke, and I was breaking. I finally broke when my 3 out of 4 trains on my journey were delayed and I had no way of contacting my friend to inform her of my new arrival time. The train managers let me use their phones to call, but when my final train was also delayed and customer services wouldn’t let me call, I broke, the tears flowed, and then I had to remember how pay phones work.

Me – friends that love me, returning home and discovering more about God’s love for me is healing my brokeness.

My phone – visited phone A&E today, is currently in the Clinical Decisions Unit, and is looking likely to be sent away to the inpatient ward. Perhaps in a weeks time I will have a phone again.

Aaaah! What am i doing here? What am i meant to do? How do i get the most out of this? How do I ensure I don’t miss out on what God has planned?

Driven, striving, anxious…

A trip to New Wine or Spring Harvest suits me, a over full programme so i can go like a dry sponge and soak up as much as possible…and probably overtire myself and get ill.

Here I have to embrace the calm, the peace, to be not to do. No schedule, just an awareness of God and an openness to His leading. Here I have to ‘learn to float’….