I put down the phone to a client. “it must be useful having a smiley sunshiney voice”, my colleague says.

If only they knew the truth…

At work I am there to encourage, to support, to care, to bless. To help people over the blip in their life that is a hospital admission.

If only they knew the truth…

The truth…that I can’t sleep at night, and sometimes i cry myself to sleep.

The truth…that i sometime wish someone would come along and ‘put me down’.

The truth…that I’m exhausted from keeping the tears at bay during work hours.

The truth that…i can hardly cope with life – household chores, interests are all dropped in favour of snuggling under the safety of the duvet.

The truth that…in the past month i have taken antidepressants and contacted the Samaritans.

The truth…that I’m a mess and the smiley sunshiney voice is simply my workplace mask.