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The pressure builds, yesterday my manager said I’m not meeting the targets, today he hassles me for an email that has been posted, but hasn’t arrived. I struggle to put together my training session ready for tomorrow, trying to work out what to include and leave out, without clear guidance on what he wants. Suddenly I decide to check if he has a projector and laptop arranged. I ring him up – you haven’t ordered one…what, who does training without a PowerPoint presentation, projected on a screen. Obviously we come from different generations. The tears start to fall. I get off the phone and text an old colleague –  I wish you were here still for a coffee, not coping today. The colleague next to me suggests I go for a walk, get some fresh air. I’m in no state to return to my presentation. I walk round the building, discover a green space I never knew, a bench in the sunshine. I ring some friends until someone picks up. I don’t want to dump my loser self on others, yet I know I need to hear that friendly voice. Half an hour later I get off the phone, the tears still fall, and my nose is running. At least I now see why this has been triggered, by speaking it out, I discover I have too much on my plate this week and I’m tired, not just the work stuff but a talk for church to write and a report for the members newsletter. I change my task for a while, praying God help me through the day, as my friend suggested. I get through the day, get home, and curl up in bed with a trashy book…

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Joining with Lisa Jo Baker

5minutefriday

 

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